We often hear stories of women’s struggles in marriage — and rightly so. But what happens when men are the ones suffering?

In the pursuit of gender equality, we must not forget that empathy must work both ways. While women have long fought for recognition of their pain in patriarchal marriages, many men silently endure emotional neglect, financial pressure, and even abuse, with no space to speak.

This isn’t about comparison — it’s about compassion.

The Unspoken Struggles of Married Men

1. Emotional Suppression

From childhood, boys are told: “Don’t cry,” “Be strong,” “Real men don’t complain.”

This programming follows them into marriage — where they’re expected to support, provide, and protect — but rarely allowed to express, break down, or receive emotional care.

Men who feel lonely, unloved, or disrespected often bottle it up. Society tells them they should be “grateful” for having a wife, but emotional needs aren’t one-sided.

2. The Burden of Being the Provider

Many men feel intense pressure to earn more, buy a house, fund children’s education, and meet societal standards of success.

Even in modern relationships, the expectation that men must “provide” still exists — regardless of their mental or financial well-being.

Failing to meet those standards can lead to shame, depression, or even suicidal thoughts, which go largely unnoticed.

3. Abuse Goes Both Ways

Yes — men can be emotionally, verbally, or even physically abused by their spouses.

But because male victims are often ridiculed or disbelieved, they rarely report or seek help.

In India, there’s no formal recognition of men as victims under domestic violence laws. This leaves many without legal protection or support.

4. Child Custody Bias

In cases of separation or divorce, men often lose custody of their children — even when they are nurturing, stable, and willing.

Courts usually favor mothers, leaving fathers feeling broken and erased from their children’s lives.

Why Don’t We Talk About This?

Because society still defines masculinity as stoic, tough, and self-sacrificing.
Because people say, “He’s a man — he’ll manage.”

Because many men themselves are afraid of being mocked if they open up.

This silence doesn’t serve equality. It reinforces the same rigid roles that hurt everyone, regardless of gender.

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Toward Truly Equal Marriages

• Emotional equality: Men deserve safe space to be vulnerable.
  
• Shared responsibility: From finances to parenting, marriage must be a partnership.
  
• Legal reform: Domestic violence laws must be inclusive of all genders.
  
• Support groups for men: Create non-judgmental platforms where men can speak openly.
  

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Equality Means Everyone

True gender equality means acknowledging pain on all sides.

It means building relationships where both partners feel heard, supported, and valued — not just one playing the “strong” role and the other the “sacrificing” one.

Because sometimes, behind the calm face of a husband, is a heart carrying silent sorrow — and it’s time we asked, “Are you okay too?”